Kids watch their parents like a hawk. Every time I went to Jo Ann Fabrics, Pill & Puff, Grebe’s Bakery, or Galst Foods with my mom she reached into her purse, pulled out her wallet and began writing a check. It was a monumental achievement to learn how to fill in the date, payee, cursive dollar amount, digit dollar amount, signature, and lest we not forget—the ever important MEMO. Yes, the complex skill of learning how to document a promissory note to a vendor was taught in classrooms across the continent as a BASIC LIFE SKILL....which is quite interesting because when I opened my first bank account I was much more careful about ordering the cutest check design than the accuracy of the contract. Shall I choose the cute checks with the pretty rose in the corner? Maybe the free, generic plain ones? Carbon copy duplicates OR... trust myself to update the register?
Now that you see where my focus was, you will totally get—that sooner than later—I received notice of an overdraft. 🤦🏽♀️When I contacted the bank I was told,
“A check was presented to the bank and your account had insufficient funds; Therefore, AS A COURTESY, your item was paid and you were charged a $35 fee.” 😮
My response: “$35!??? Why didn’t you just reject it!??? That’s a hefty fee!” I totally ignored the kind gesture part because I had to PAY for it.
The other day a friend of mine mentioned that she was attempting to cross the street without a traffic light, and even though the cars going by saw her standing there, they sped on by and kept going. “THEY SEE ME”, she said,....”BUT THEY DON’T EVEN HAVE THE COMMON COURTESY TO STOP AND LET ME CROSS!” In my head, all I could think was ‘...but the cars are not required to stop because they have the right of way.’ Are we supposed to penalize people who follow rules and ‘stay in their own lane’ even though they had an option to go above and beyond? 🤷🏽♀️
If you are a woman living in Atlanta, Georgia, it is likely that each time you approach an office entrance a man will go out of his way to hold the door open for you. If you live in Wisconsin and you are approaching an office or any building entrance......., well....um.....DON’T LET THE DOOR HIT YOU WHERE THE GOOD LORD SPLIT YA! 🥺
Courtesy, which is usually a chunk of generosity sprinkled with a spoonful of politeness and respect should generally be done purely out of the kindness of one’s heart—without expectation or cost. Most often it seems that we extend courtesies to others while subconsciously assuming that someone else will do the same. Acts of kindness and courtesy might be more visible in certain regions or territories, yet in order to truly yield the genuine, happy KARMIC REWARD, such acts should be done solely because one wants to and is eager to serve or honor that person, that being, or the universe. Giving someone $50 because, ‘you don’t want to hear their mouth’ later, does NOT translate into a courtesy. Baking a cake for a neighbor because they brought over a pie last month and you don’t want them to have something to “hold over your head”—also, NOT a courtesy. Kids watch their parents like a hawk, including the selfless deeds they do or don’t perform each day for others. I have not met many parents who fail to teach their children to be NICE to others. Only after the suffering of numerous storms or catastrophes do many humans lean toward a philosophy that no one owes us anything and being alive and able-bodied is a gift to be cherished and appreciated with every breath. My hope for all is that with or without trauma, courtesy becomes a natural way of life that never requires or expects payback.
Oh, wait...my OTHER hope is that you do not put too many bills on autopay with Chase Bank.
It is time....ANNNNND.....ON My Q...... IN 10 WEEKS ONMYQ CELEBRATES ONE FULL YEAR! HANG IN THERE WITH ME TO CELEBRATE! NEXT, if you spoke GALLAS instead of Galst, you are SOOO MILWAUKEE! What stores do you recall visiting with your mom as a kid? Do you remember your first book of checks? Do you still use them? When was the last time you performed an act of courtesy with zero expectations? You all fill me with joy and I appreciate you reading my blog each week! #booktitlein5weeks